I was deep in the library stacks, hunting down a journal article so old it hadn’t been digitized yet. As I rounded the corner of Aisle 5 Section 2, there he was, leaning against a post and holding a clipboard.

“Vinnie? What are you doing here?”

“Waiting for you. You weren’t in your office.”

“But how…? Never mind. What can I do for you?”

“It’s the time-dilation thing. You said that there’s two kinds, a potential energy kind and a kinetic energy kind, but you only told me about the first one.”

“Hey, Ramona broke up that conversation, don’t blame me. You got blank paper on that clipboard?”

“Sure. Here.”

“Quick review — we said that potential energy only depends on where you are. Suppose you and a clock are at some distance ** r** away from a massive object like that Gargantua black hole, and my clock is way far away. I see your clock ticking slower than mine. The ratio of their ticking rates,

**, only depends on the slow clock’s position. Suppose you move even closer to the massive object. That**

*t*√[1-(2_{slow}/t_{fast }=*G·M/r·c*²)]**-value gets smaller, the fraction inside the parentheses gets closer to 1, the square root gets smaller and I see your clock slow down even more. Sound familiar?”**

*r*“Yeah, but what about the kinetic thing?”

“I’m getting there. You know Einstein’s famous * E_{Einstein}=m·c²* equation. See? The formula contains neither a velocity nor a position. That means

*is the energy content of a particle that’s not moving and not under the influence of any gravitational or other force fields. Under those conditions the object is isolated from the Universe and we call*

**E**_{Einstein}*its*

**m***rest mass*. We good?”

“Yeah, yeah.”

“OK, remember the equation for gravitational potential energy?”

“** E=G·M·m/r.**”

“Let’s call that * E_{gravity}*. Now what’s the ratio between gravitational potential energy and the rest-mass energy?”

“Uh … ** E_{gravity}/E_{Einstein} = G·M·m/r·m·c² = G·M/r·c²**. Hey, that’s exactly half the fraction inside the square root up there.

**. Cool.”**

*t*√[1-(2_{slow}/t_{fast }=*E*)]_{gravity}/E_{Einstein}“Glad you like it. Now, with that under our belts we’re ready for the kinetic thing. What’s Newton’s equation for the kinetic energy of an object that has velocity ** v**?”

“** E=½·m·v².**”

“I thought you’d know that. Let’s call it ** E_{kinetic}**. Care to take a stab at the equation for kinetic time dilation?”

“As a guess, ** t_{slow}/t_{fast }= √[1-(2 E_{kinetic}/E_{Einstein})]**. Hey, if I plug in the formulas for each of the energies, the halves and the mass cancel out and I get

*t*√[1-2(½_{slow}/t_{fast }=*m·v²/m·c²*)]**. Is that it?”**

*=*√[1-(*v²/c²*)]“Close. In Einstein’s math the kinetic energy expression is more complicated, but it leads to the same formula as yours. If the velocity’s zero, the square root is 1.0 and there’s no time-slowing. If the object’s moving at light-speed (* v=c*), the square root is zero and the slow clock is infinitely slow. What’s interesting is that an object’s rest energy acts like a universal energy yardstick — both flavors of time-slowing are governed by how the current energy quantity compares to

**.”**

*E*_{Einstein}“Wait — kinetic energy depends on velocity, right, which means that it’ll look different from different inertial frames. Does that mean that the kinetic time-slowing depends on the frames, too?”

“Sure it does. Best case is if we’re both in the same frame, which means I see you in straight-line motion. Each of us would get the same number if we measure the other’s velocity. Plug that into the equation and each of us would see the same * t_{slow}* for the other’s clock. If we’re not doing uniform straight lines then we’re in different frames and our two dilation measurements won’t agree.”

“… Ramona doesn’t dance in straight lines, does she, Sy?”

“That reminds me of Einstein’s quote — ‘*Put your hand on a hot stove for a minute, and it seems like an hour. Sit with a pretty girl for an hour, and it seems like a minute. That’s relativity.*‘ You’re thinking curves now, eh?”

“Are you boys discussing me?”

<*unison*> “Oh, hi, Ramona.”

~~ Rich Olcott