Late in the day, project’s half done but it’s hungry time. I could head home for a meal and drive back, but instead I board the elevator down to Eddie’s Pizza on the second floor. The door opens on 8 and Jeremy gets on, with a girl.

“Oh, hi, Mr. Moire. Didja see I hit a triple in the last game? What if the Sun became a black hole? This is that English girl I told you about.”

“Hello, Jennie.”

“Wotcha, Sy.”

“You know each other?”

“Ra-ther. He wrote me into his blog a year ago. You were going on about particles then, right, Sy?”

“Right, Jennie, but that was particles confined in atoms. Jeremy’s interested in larger prey.”

“So I hear.”

The elevator lets us out at Eddie’s place. We luck into a table, order and resume talking. I open with, “What’s a particle?”

“Well, Sy, your post with Jeremy says it’s an abstract point with a minimal set of properties, like mass and charge, in a mathematical model of a real object with just that set of properties.”

“Ah, you’ve been reading my stuff. That simplifies things. So *when* can we treat a black hole like a particle? Did you see anything about that in my archives, Jennie?”

“The nearest I can recall was Professor ‘t Hooft’s statement. Ermm… if the Sun’s so far away that we can calculate planetary orbits accurately by treating it as a point, then we’re justified in doing so.”

“And if the Sun were to suddenly collapse to a black hole?”

“It’d be a lot smaller, even more like a point. No change in gravity then. But wouldn’t Earth be caught up in relativity effects like space compression?’

“Not unless you’re really close. Space compression around a non-rotating (Schwarzchild) black hole scales by a factor that looks like , where *D* is the object’s diameter and *d* is your distance from it. Suppose the Sun suddenly collapsed without losing any mass to become a Schwarzchild object. The object’s diameter would be a bit less than 4 miles. Earth is 93 million miles from the Sun so the compression factor here would be [*poking numbers into my smartphone*] 1.000_000_04. Nothing you’d notice. It’d be 1.000_000_10 at Mercury. You wouldn’t see even 1% compression until you got as close as 378 miles, 10% only inside of 43 miles. Fifty percent of the effect shows up in the last 13 miles. The edge of a black hole is sharper than this pizza knife.”

“How about if it’s spinning? Ms Plenum referred me to a reading about frame-dragging.”

“Ah, Jeremy, you’re thinking of Gargantua, the *Interstellar* movie’s strangely lopsided black hole. I just ran across this report by Robbie Gonzalez. He goes into detail on why the image is that way, and why it should have looked more like this picture. Check out the blueshift on the left and the shift into the infra-red on the right.”

[*both*] “Awesome!”

“So it’s the spin making the weirdness then, Sy?”

“Yes, ma’am. If Gargantua weren’t rotating, then the space around it would be perfectly spherical. As Gonzalez explains, the movie’s plotline needed an even more extreme spacetime distortion than they could get from that. Dr Kip Thorne, their physics guru, added more by spinning his mathematical model nearly up to the physical limit.”

“I’ll bite, Mr Moire. What’s the limit?”

“Rotating so fast that points on the equator would be going at lightspeed. Can’t do that. Anyhow, extreme spin alters spacetime distortion, which goes from spherical to pumpkin-shaped with a twist. The radial scaling changes form, too, from to . *A* is proportional to spin. When *A* is small (not much spin) or the distance is large those *A/d²* terms essentially vanish relative to the others and the scaling looks just like the simple almost-a-point Schwarzchild case. When *A* is large or the distance is small the* A/d²* terms dominate top and bottom, the factor equals 1 and there’s dragging but no compression. In the middle, things get interesting and that’s where Dr Thorne played.”

“So no relativity jolt to Earth.”

“Yep.”

“Here’s your pizzas.”

“Thanks, Eddie.”

[*sounds of disappearing pizza*]

~~ Rich Olcott