The Acme Building is quiet on summer evenings. I was in my office, using the silence to catch up on paperwork. Suddenly I heard a fizzing sound. Naturally I looked around. She was leaning against the door frame.
White satin looked good on her, and she looked good in it. A voice like molten silver — “Hello, Mr Moire.”
“Hello yourself. What can I do for you?”
“I’m open to suggestions, but first you can help me find myself.”
“Excuse me, but you’re right here. And besides, who are you?”
“Not where I am but when I am. Anne.”
“You said it right the first time.”
“No, no, my name is Anne. At the moment. I think. Oh, it’s so confusing when your memory works in circles but not very well. Do you have the time?”
“Well, I was busy, but you’re here and much more interesting.”
“No, I mean, what time is it?”
I showed her my desk clock — date, time, even the phase of the moon.
“Half past gibbous already? Oh, bread-and-butter…”
“Wait — circles? Time’s one-dimensional. Clock readings increase or decrease, they don’t go sideways.”
“You don’t know Time as well as I do, Mr Moire. It’s a lot more complicated than that. Time can be triangular, haven’t you noticed?”
“Can’t say as I have.”
“That paperwork you’re working on, are you near a deadline?”
“Nah.”
“And given that expanse of time, you feel free to permit distractions. There are so many distractions.”
“You’re very distracting.”
“Thank you, I guess. But suppose you had an important deadline coming up tomorrow. That broad flow of possibilities at the beginning of the project has narrowed to just two — finish or don’t finish. Your Time has closed in on you.”
“So you’re saying we can think of Time as two-dimensional. The second dimension being…?”
“I don’t know. I just go there. That’s the problem.”
“Hmm… When you do, do you feel like you’re turning left or right?”
“No turning or moving forward or backward. Generally I have to … umm… ‘push’ like I’m going uphill, but that only works if there’s a ‘being pushed’ when I get past that. Otherwise I’m back where I started, whatever that means.”
“What do you see? What changes during the episode?”
“Little things. <brief fizzing sound. She … flickered.> Like ‘over there’ you’re wearing a bright green T-shirt instead of what you’re wearing here. And you’re using pen-and-paper instead of that laptop. Green doesn’t suit you.”
“I know, which is why there’s nothing green in my wardrobe, here. But that gives me an idea. Did you always have to ‘push’ to get ‘over there’?”
“Usually.”
“Fine. OK, I’m going to flip this coin. While it’s in the air, ‘push’ just lightly and come back to tell me which way the coin fell.”
<fizzing> “Heads.”
“It’s tails here. OK, we’re going to do that again but this time ‘push’ much harder.”
<louder fizzing> “That was weird. Your coin rolled off the desk and landed on edge in a crack in the floor so it’s not heads or tails.”
“AaaHAH!”
“?”
“Your ‘over theres’ have different levels of probability than ‘over here.’ They’re different realities. Actually, I’ll bet you travel across ranges of probability. Or tunnel through them, maybe. That’d why you have to ‘push’ to get past something that’s less probable in order to get to something that’s more probable. Like getting past a reality where the coin can just hang in the air or fly apart.”
“I’ve done that. Once I sneezed while ‘pushing’ and wound up sitting at a tea party where the cream and sugar just refused to stir into the tea. When I ‘pushed’ from there I practically fell into a coffee shop where the coffee was well-behaved.”
“Case closed. Now I can answer your question. Spacewise, you’re in my office on the twelfth floor. Timewise, I just showed you my clock. As for which reality, you’re in one with a very high probability because, well, you’re here.”
“So provincial. Oh, Mr Moire, how little you know.” <fizzing>
On the 12th floor of the Acme Building, high above the city, one man still tries to answer the Universe’s persistent questions — Sy Moire, Physics Eye.
~~ Rich Olcott







“You’ll have to unravel that for me.”












, where D is the object’s diameter and d is your distance from it. Suppose the Sun suddenly collapsed without losing any mass to become a Schwarzchild object. The object’s diameter would be a bit less than 4 miles. Earth is 93 million miles from the Sun so the compression factor here would be [poking numbers into my smartphone] 1.000_000_04. Nothing you’d notice. It’d be 1.000_000_10 at Mercury. You wouldn’t see even 1% compression until you got as close as 378 miles, 10% only inside of 43 miles. Fifty percent of the effect shows up in the last 13 miles. The edge of a black hole is sharper than this pizza knife.”

. A is proportional to spin. When A is small (not much spin) or the distance is large those A/d² terms essentially vanish relative to the others and the scaling looks just like the simple almost-a-point Schwarzchild case. When A is large or the distance is small the A/d² terms dominate top and bottom, the factor equals 1 and there’s dragging but no compression. In the middle, things get interesting and that’s where Dr Thorne played.”